The Wall
by brenners
Summary: Because even magic can't take away a teenage girl's need to rate boys in bathroom graffiti. Minerva and Rolanda had no idea what they were starting...
1. Prologue

Disclaimer: I once owned Harry Potter, but then my alarm clock rang. Not really mine, it turns out.

(Merry Christmas)

Prologue

The professors were to blame. Giving teenage girls with a well-hidden love of mischief whole periods of time when they were some of the few students out of class was blatant irresponsibility on the part of the staff. Some trouble was unavoidable, really, they ought to expect worse.

Satisfied with her justifications, Minerva McGonagall gave a small smile of consent to her best friend, Rolanda Hooch, and took out her favourite eagle feather quill. Thank Merlin she hadn't gotten prefect, it had been disappointing at the time, but Minerva would never have let herself do this if she was in a position of responsibility.

This particular mode of trouble making wasn't actually like her, it was a bit too sneaky, she would normally prefer a nice, straightforward prank (Minerva was nothing if not straightforward). She did, however, like a good joke, and was willing to accommodate her friend as long as Rolanda's idea didn't lose them House points. Pulling out the list they had made the night before, they began to copy it name for name onto the wall.

It took less then ten minutes for the two girls to leave their permanent mark on Hogwarts. They would have preferred a Quidditch cup, but being the first students to place a rating of boys on a bathroom wall was something, too.


	2. Molly Prewett

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter, ask anyone.

Molly

For the second time that day, a 6th year named Molly Prewett walked purposefully to the bathroom nearest to the Great Hall. Before, she had been with a crowd of her friends, all keen to see the ratings that many of their classmates had recently been added to. This time, Molly came alone, and armed with a quill.

There were a few names on that wall that were in desperate need of correcting. First, she crossed out Tom Macdonald's 10 and replaced it with a 5, as punishment for the way he had humiliated her friend Emma when he had found out that Emma liked him, back in third year. Anyone who could deliberately upset such a kind girl was clearly not deserving of a 10, the only thing he deserved was to fall in love with Professor Dippet. Molly considered that idea, and decided that the love potion she had just studied in potions might be up to the job… maybe she'd brew a little extra for Henry Law (9), Molly needed a date for the next Hogsmeade trip, and Henry was certainly handsome.

The other name she edited was Arthur Weasley, who was in her house and therefore most of her classes. Whoever had added his name had given him a not-very-generous 6.5. Arthur, though a little eccentric, was one of the sweetest people she knew, had lovely hair, and would always stand up for another student, a fellow Gryffindor or not, against the Slytherins. He was in fact at least a 7 in looks, even if not for his personality, which bumped him up to an 8.5, Molly decided, as she changed the number beneath his name.

Hearing voices nearby, she returned her quill to her pocket and rushed to the sinks, where she spent several minutes pretending to fix her hair before leaving the wall's newest admirers, a small group of Hufflepuffs, to wonder over Molly's work.


	3. Lily Evans

Disclaimer: I'm nowhere near owning Harry Potter. It'd be cool if I did though.

Merry Christmas

Lily

Lily Evans had known about the ratings on the bathroom wall for years. They were the reason she avoided going that bathroom, usually choosing to walk up an extra flight of stairs instead. Some of the ratings were amusing, most accurate, but several unkind. She hated that her best friend Sev was in negative numbers, though even she couldn't call him good looking. It was no question that he deserved to pass zero, though. But no matter how much she told herself that she despised those ratings, every time she set foot in that room, she found herself checking them.

It was a guilty fascination. Lily would find herself thinking about them sometimes; during a class practicing a charm she'd already mastered, in the last few minutes before she fell asleep, or while working on an essay that just didn't want to be put on paper. She would think about the people that had written them, wondering if they had known Severus, if they had some reason to particularly dislike him. Or if they'd just been siding with Potter, who's name was also on the wall, along with a 8.8 in the same light blue ink as Sev's -5. The interest Lily felt was the main part of the reason she worked so hard to stay away. Mild curiosity was one thing, but Lily didn't want to _care_ so much about something that was so against her beliefs.

The ratings were immature, against the rules, and offensive to many people. But Lily couldn't help but doubt hurt was intended, or that the writers would particularly care if she thought they were childish troublemakers. And, somehow, knowing that didn't bother Lily, because even if the ratings were hurtful, in the back of her heart, Lily liked them anyways. The ratings were also amusing, and accurate, and many fairly generous. The writers couldn't be all that bad.

Except for the one with the light blue ink. She ought to be slapped in the face.

A/N: Thanks for reading! Reviews are appreciated, if you don't want to write something, just copy and paste one of these:

You're polluting my brain and the internet.  
Not great but alright.  
I enjoyed it.  
You've changed my life with this chapter, I've never read anything with so much awesomeoisity.


	4. Sirius Black

**Disclaimer: If I owned Harry Potter, I would be able to sell this story. For money. But I don't, so I can't.**

Sirius

For the first time he could remember, Sirius Black was breaking rules against his will. He rarely did not want to do something illegal (and therefore fun), and if he didn't then he simply did not it. Not many people could make the sixth year do anything he did not want to do. Unfortunately, his best friend and current accomplice, James Potter, was one of those people.

"They said by the Great Hall. Where is there a bathroom by the Great Hall?" James hissed, louder than necessary, considering he and Sirius were crammed under the same invisibility cloak.

"You tell me, the map's in your pocket," Sirius answered, rolling his eyes at his friend. James had been anxious, though he'd deny it, ever since he'd overheard Mary MacDonald and Jenny Ellis talking about some sort of rating system that the girls had recorded on the bathroom wall. He'd interrogated them until they told James where it was, not that they had really resisted. The two girls had clearly expected that he would never actually _go_ into the bathroom. They did not know him very well.

James, desperate to know his own rating, which the girls had withheld from him, had tried to convince his friends to join him. Peter, usually an easy sell when it came to things like this, was in the hospital wing, where he was recovering from a Potions accident that had left him entirely purple. Remus had flat out refused to leave his bed citing that it was 2 o' clock in the morning, with James' protests that it was only 1:56 seemingly not making much of an impression. Knowing that James would complain until somebody gave in, Sirius agreed to join him.

Well aware he was very good-looking, Sirius was not concerned about his own rating. He had received enough compliments and blushes to know he had no need to worry. He was, however, a little concerned that James would find a low number next to his name and spend the next month trying to convince himself that he was extraordinarily handsome. The entire scenario was extremely possible, and Sirius began mentally plotting ways that he could shut James up.

"Here it is," whispered James, elbowing Sirius back to the present. They were standing in front of a completely average door, which did not seem deserving of the tone of reverence in James' voice. James darted out from under the cloak and rushed through the door like someone had told him Lily Evans was waiting in there with a Shooting Star and a kiss. Sirius raised an eyebrow and followed, double-checking for patrols first.

Spotting some ink on one of the stall doors as he pulled off the cloak, Sirius wandered towards it as James examined the underside of a sink. Quickly processing the writing, he spotted his name next to a 14, which seemed odd as the rest of the ratings seemed to be out of ten. Sirius grinned, always up for some flattery, as he checked the ratings nearby. He was looking over Remus' 7 and Peter's 4.5 when he saw his favourite.

"Prongs! Get in here and have a look at this," he called out.

"Did you know it was in here the whole time?" asked James as he entered the stall. Sirius ignored him and pointed to the area that included their names.

"8.8! Not bad, I mean, of course," James beamed, running a hand through his hair. "Wonder if Evans wrote it, bet she did, anyone else would put an even 9." Sirius, used to his friend's slightly distorted view of himself (and the majority of the Hogwarts population buying into it), just elbowed James and pointed to a rating a few inches away from James' name.

"-5? Classic. Perfect for greaseboy," James said. "Look, it's the same ink as ours, there must be an incredibly perceptive witch out there who likes light blue. Bet she knows us."

"Course she does. Must know Snivillus, too, I can't see anyone not familiar with his charming personality being that generous."

"Yeah. C'mon, let's go back to the dorm, I'm tired." Sirius looked at James for a long moment, then decided not to say anything. James rarely was the one to suggest going back, but it wasn't a big deal. They'd seen what they had come to see anyway, and Sirius hadn't even wanted to go in the first place, so he couldn't really complain now. As long as James was just quietly acting odd, then he would get over whatever was bothering him on his own, like always. There was no way he would keep it up, not when tomorrow there was the opportunity to discuss a few numbers with Jenny and Mary.

**A/N: I was pretty disappointed not a single person took me up on my copy and paste review suggestions. So here they are again, this can't get any easier for you. Just copy and paste the one that fits you best. And of course, original reviews are welcome and appreciated.  
**

You're polluting my brain and the internet.  
Not great but alright.  
I enjoyed it.  
You've changed my life with this chapter, I've never read anything with so much awesomeoisity.


	5. Hermione Granger

Disclaimer: No. Just no. I don't own Harry Potter.

Hermione

Hermione had been crying in the stall for over an hour by the time she noticed that somebody had written on the wall. At first she was horrified, how could someone vandalize _Hogwarts_, of all places? Not only was it arguably the greatest place in the world, it was a school of magic! Surely there were spells that would erase ink immediately. It was as she made a mental note to research cleaning spells in the library (Mr. Filch never seemed to use any), that she began to realize what was written.

Was giving boys ratings out of ten a typical thing to do? It seemed to be more of something that the boys themselves would do, only rating girls, of course. Maybe girls did this all the time, and Hermione just wasn't in on the secret. It certainly seemed like something her roommates would do, now that she thought of it.

Hermione couldn't help it, she began it study the entries, telling herself it was like an artifact, and she was discovering the daily lives and opinions of past generations of Hogwarts students. The writing covered most of the wall, and was in many different writing styles and colours (the colourful scripts were nearer to the edge, evidently the early ratings predated coloured ink). Hermione recognized quite a few of the names, some from books, even a couple of her professors were there (it was bizarre to imagine Professor Dumbledore as the younger teacher who had once warranted a 7.8).

The ratings had absorbed Hermione so much that she had forgotten why she was in the stall in the first place, until she was reminded with a jolt by the entry for a Bill Weasley (9.4). It was hard to believe anyone related to Ronald Weasley could be attractive, the boy was horrible. He was mean, insensitive, rude, arrogant, lazy, and he wasn't even very good at magic. Ron may have been occasionally mildly amusing, and seemed to be a good friend to Harry Potter, but he was certainly not worth the grief he had given her. She decided then and there to tell the boy what she thought of him (although not until her eyes looked normal again, she couldn't stand the idea of Ron knowing he'd made her cry), when she got an additional idea for revenge.

Pulling out her quill and ink, pausing for a moment, lifting her hand, pausing again, reaching to put away her quill, pausing again, and finally steeling herself with the theory that a few more words couldn't hurt, she wrote in large, neat printing; Ron Weasley, 0.001. Hermione then decided she had been too generous, and changed the 1 into a zero, added another zero, and finally awarded Ron with the ranking of one millionth. She remembered that Harry Potter, while not insulting her, had not defended her either, even though they were fairly friendly, and was surprised to realize that she was almost as mad at him as she was at Ron. That seemed irrational, so she decided to be kind and give Harry a 3.

Somehow, striking back had inspired a fresh wave of tears, so Hermione replaced the quill in her hand with one of the handkerchiefs that her mother had insisted she pack in her school trunk, and got comfortable, ready to wait until there were no tears left to cry.

**A/N: Copy and paste review suggestions, for the short on time:**

I plan to beat myself over the head until I forget reading this perfect 'what not to do' example.  
Only so-so, but bearable.  
Pretty good.  
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**Or even better, leave some constructive criticism! **

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	6. Luna Lovegood

**Disclaimer: Not only do I not own Harry Potter, I don't even have the creativity to come up with a clever disclaimer.**

**Sorry for the delay, my life woke up again. Ginny's chapter should be up soon, though. I really enjoyed writing Luna, she thinks in different directions than most people.**

Luna Lovegood drifted into the bathroom, with her eyes focused on taking in everything that she passed. The third year had left her dorm to explore the castle instead of staying and listening to the giggles of her roommates, who hadn't invited her to join them, then or ever before. Bathrooms hadn't been a particular place she'd wanted to visit, but you never knew what you could find in bathroom once the people had left. Many creatures were attracted to the water and smooth surfaces.

The room was beautiful in it's own way, as all Hogwarts rooms were. A high ceiling, patterned tile floors, even the labyrinth of pipes below the sink had a sort of beauty to them, like a maze for the gloogerfish. She wondered if they were in the now, feasting on the diluted soap from the last hands to have been washed. Luna bent over to listen and heard a small creak.

"Hello to you, too," she told them, smiling, and walked across the room, away from the sinks, as the tiny fish enjoyed their privacy and did not like to be approached, even around those they had indicated their liking of by making small creaking noises.

Now only steps from the row of stalls, Luna began to peek into them, one by one. The first two were empty, besides an abandoned towel lying on the floor underneath the partition between the two. In the third, there wasn't anything of too much interest, besides some writing on the wall. Luna entered to take a closer look, people would say some fascinating things when they thought it was anonymous.

The majority of the writing was a collection of ratings for Hogwarts boys, many of them names Luna had never heard. There were also a few arrows pointing off to comments on the posted names, agreeing or disagreeing, making jokes or insults. It was interesting how many of the ratings were political, all of the boys who roamed the halls surrounded by crowd of friends had higher ratings than Luna would have expected, and the ones who looked similar but were quieter and more solitary had lower numbers. Like Colin Creevy, who was in her year but in Gryffindor, and had a 4, despite his regular features and friendly face, and the popular inexplicably Zacharias Smith, 7.8, who had a large noise that he liked to keep turned up at the world.

There were a few exceptions to Luna's rule, though. Harry Potter, a visible figure if there ever was one, had only a 3. He was reasonably good looking, although quite small and skinny, and coupled with his fame it seemed like he should be boosted him up towards an seven or so. People were strange.

The other Hogwarts students probably found these rankings important. Luna didn't, so that's why she was so sure the others did. A few of the rankings were amusingly true though, and some did line up with Luna's own opinion. She smiled softly as she left the stall. It had been a good night, she thought, the others hadn't insulted her once, she'd found a new gloogerfish home, and the secret passageway near the common room had finally opened for her. It was time to go back, she knew, only so many good things could happen in a day, and she'd used all of hers up. Besides, it wouldn't do to be late for Transfiguration the next morning, Professor McGonagall already had an unhealthy love of promptness that may someday attract willagees, it wouldn't do to farther agitate her and make her even more susceptible to infection.

**Thanks for reading! Reviewers are incredibly intelligent, attractive, and interesting people. So are people who vote on the poll on my profile about what other characters will get chapters.**


	7. George Weasley

**Disclaimer: Nothing's changed in the past few weeks, I still do not own Harry Potter. In case you thought I'd somehow pulled it off...**

During their sixth year of Hogwarts George Weasley and his twin brother, Fred, swore that they would visit every single room in the castle. They did not fully realize at the time just how many rooms were in the castle. But they weren't the type to shirk a challenge, so with the help of the Marauders' Map, they had managed to cover more than half the school by May. By then, George began to hate himself a little for suggesting the idea.

"Honestly Fred, I think at this point we've been in all of the interesting rooms! Is there really any reason to go in an empty classroom?" He asked, as they roamed the halls for the fifth night in a row. Sneaking out was all well and good, but he was beginning to miss his bed.

"Are you saying you want to stop?" Fred asked, with no curiosity in his voice, he always seemed to already know the answer any question he asked George.

"No, of course not, I'm just complaining. Where's left to go on this floor?" George replied.

"Two bathrooms and a broom cupboard," Fred said to the map.

"In the middle of the night? What are the odds we'll run into a couple-"

"And have to invite them along on this wonderful adventure? Pretty high. Fair enough, we'll skip the broom closet, and the boys' bathroom's the one by the Great hall, we can go in the whenever, so we can ditch that one for tonight," Fred explained. "Next thing you know, we'll be done for the night and we'll be snug in our beds."

"Like Ronnie with a teddy bear," George finished, speeding up to round the corner that he knew their final stop was waiting. It wouldn't be the first time he'd been in a girls' bathroom, the pair been in a few others in their travels, as well as one George had walked into by accident, he'd been avoiding Wood and ducked into the first doorway he'd seen, which had turned out to hold several girls' checking their hair. He'd pretended to have been there on purpose, said hello, and ducked back out before they'd gotten over their shock.

Taking a short trip back to the present, George pushed open the bathroom door, only to have Fred duck though first. "Thanks for the excellent service, dear boy, I must remember to tip you later." George resisted the urge to smack Fred right in his smug looking mouth and surveyed the room they'd just entered instead. Nothing special, typical bathroom tile and metal, the sinks and stalls that he'd expect. It was a bit roomier then most bathrooms that he'd seen, though.

He glanced over at Fred, who was peeking into the stalls at the far end of the row. "Alright, we've officially been here. Now let's go back to the dorm and rest up, or else I'll lose my charm and good looks, and then people will have absolutely no reason to talk to you," George said lightly.

"Alright, sure let's go get you your beauty sleep, Merlin knows you nee-, wait, get over here." George rolled his eyes and followed his twin near-order and poked his head in the stall that Fred had disappeared into. Fred rapidly glanced back and forth between one stall wall and George. George got the picture fairly quickly and looked it over. More than half of the otherwise typical wall of the stall was covered in writing, which, when George looked closer he saw were a rating system. There were at least a hundred names and numbers on that wall.

"They would be so offended if we did this," George breathed thorough a grin.

"I sure am offended myself, now that you mention it. 8? And a shared rating, too. Completely ignoring our independent spirits, individualistic personalities, and other stuff like that. And besides, I'm an 9.9, you're the one who's dragging us down."

"Keep telling yourself that, Fred, keep telling yourself that." Keeping only half a mind on their banter, George inspected the other ratings. Good for Bill, he thought, looking for other names he knew. He smiled over Ron's very low rating, but didn't point it out to Fred, Ron was insecure enough without them teasing him about this.

Some idiot had given Draco Malfoy a 7.5, had to be a girl with a pureblood fetish. George snorted at the name of their old Defense professor, Lockhart, and his 10 surrounded by hearts and exclamation marks, all in different types of ink. Idiot.

"I think it's time to strike back for this blatant and ruthless assault on our self-confidence," Fred said, turning to George with his pranking grin spreading across his face.

George couldn't help it, the smile spread to him too. "Surely you're not suggesting we avenge ourselves?"

"Of course not. We'll do it for the innocent children who've been harmed by this crime to humanity." George felt his grin spread across his face an his twin's rationalizing. It didn't matter that his words only made a minimal amount of sense, the girls of Hogwarts were getting pranked big…

**Thanks for reading! Sorry about the space between updates, I've been busy and also agonizing over this (longer than usual...) chapter. **

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	8. Ginny Weasley

**Disclaimer: You thought I was JK Rowling, didn't you! I know you thought so, you silly goose, you... no. Think again**

Ginny Weasley

The group of fifth years entered the bathroom with no more ceremony than they ever did. It was, after all, a toilet. The particular visit to the bathroom wasn't special in any way, not until Anna began to talk to the others from the stall she had chosen.

"There are ratings in here!" She announced, "Check it out!"

"Er, no thanks, not when you're in there," Emily said with raised eyebrows.

"Shut up, I just got in here, it's safe," Anna snapped back, as the stall door creaked open. The others pushed in, Ginny Weasley in the lead.

"Hey Gin, Micheal Corner, 8.6, maybe you made a mistake," Cate said through an grin. Ginny laughed, she knew how much her friends hated Michael, they'd been happy to share their opinions both before and after they had dated, though never during, being the good friends they were, the others had all kept their thoughts to themselves besides the odd slip-up.

"If I made a mistake, how do you explain Dean's 9?" Ginny, playing along, threw back, while absentmindedly checking out Bill's 9.4 with a touch of pride.

"Who the hell gave Harry Potter a three?" Emily exclaimed, then blushed. "What? Who do you know that would? I mean, forget looks, he's Harry freaking Potter, he gets extra points just for that!"

Ginny privately agreed, but remembered that during the previous year when Harry was about as popular as Peeves, maybe the rating had been posted then. "Should I be worried?" Ginny teased, bouncing back, not willing to pass up the chance to get a little retribution for all those years of being teased about her crush, which, though no longer as open and embarrassing as in the past, was still alive and well, and notorious among their group of friends. It was a constant, and something to joke about, but about as likely to go somewhere at this point as Anna's crush on Victor Krum.

"Forget it, he's all yours, I don't think my boyfriend would approve," Emily said dryly.

Ginny opened her mouth to reply, but out of the corner of her eye spotted another Weasley written up on the wall. She leaned closer, and there it was, clear as anything, Ron Weasley, 0.00001. Must have been written by someone he'd offended with one of his jokes, Merlin knew he'd done it to her enough. Still, no one insulted one of her brothers (when he couldn't defend himself) and got away with it, even if Ron did probably deserve it.

"Does anybody have a quill?" One was pressed into her hand. Ginny could feel the eyes watching her, but at this point none of them even bothered to try and stop her when she did things like this, the just sat back and watched the show and then leapt to her defense after it was all over.

Ginny crossed out the number and paused before writing anything else. It would be a bit weird if she gave her brother a really high rating. And objectively, he was only semi good-looking. A 7.5 would do just fine. As an afterthought, although her friends would probably think it was her plan all along, Harry was awarded a completely unbiased 9.2.

"Isn't that a little generous?" Anna said hesitantly.

"Aw, she can't help it, she's in love." Cate cooed. Ginny honoured her with her best glare, the one usually reserved for Ron when he was at his worst. Cate looked appropriately ashamed, so Ginny softened it to the sort of glare she gave Charlie when he babied her.

"I thought you were on Dean's side," Emily said, "Where's your loyalty, Catie?"

"I am too loyal! Why is everyone so mean to me today?"

"You're getting too cheeky, we don't like it. You're the quiet one, stick with what works."

Ginny ignored her friends bickering, and smiled a little, thinking of her boyfriend. He really was sweet, when he wasn't being an idiot, and he tried so hard to keep her happy. They had been having a lot of stupid fights lately, but when they were getting along she was reminded of why she liked him. Those times would sometimes last a little while, and she would go days without thinking of Harry Potter as anything but her friend, her Quidditch captain. That crush that she had had on Harry for as long as she could remember was a habit, something that she'd just gotten used to as a unchanging part of her life. It seemed like the best Ginny could do was push it to the side, dress it up as friendship, and follow Hermione's advice of getting on with her life anyway.

"Let's go, guys, lunch is waiting for us, Dean's saving us spots." Ginny told them, smiling at their antics like her mother smiled at Fred and George when she thought nobody was watching.

"Saving you a spot, more like." Anna pointed out as they piled out of the stall.

"No, four spots will be saved. Wait and see, she's got him trained," Emily mock sighed, "Can he talk to Adam for me?" The girls all laughed as they left the bathroom, except for Anna, who had dropped behind.

"Guys, wait… I never, y'know, went…"

**A/N: A speedy update, to apologize for the last one. Instead of copy and paste reviews, tell me if you think I gave Ginny's (OC) friends too much of the chapter. I was torn about posting it as is, sooo, did I screw it up or not? Do tell. **


	9. Moaning Myrtle

**A new chapter? Surely not! But surely yes, because there is, in fact, a new chapter. The new lack of typos, errant commas, etc, is a result of my new, impressively speedy, beta, meltinglacier! (all authors notes were not so lucky... hence these unnecessary, mysterious parenthesis...)  
**

**Disclaimer: JKR wrote 7 elaborately** **plotted books in about 15 years. I can't get 650 words done in 4 months.** **It seems unlikely that we are one and the same.**

Myrtle

It was the perfect night to roam the school, Myrtle mused as she drifted through a wall. After almost a century of imperfection, she would know. It was a Tuesday night, and there weren't any students out; few had the spirit to sneak out on a Tuesday. No Peeves either, at the moment, he didn't understand the value of solitude.

Myrtle took a shortcut through a locked door and finally came within sight of her destination. Inside that room was one of the few things at Hogwarts to give her joy over these too-many years. It wasn't home, but the girls' washroom off the Great Hall did have its own appeal. To her, all bathrooms did. The way everyone was in such a hurry to leave, they were the ideal place to go to be alone. Besides those few years back in the 20th century when it had been trendy to take illegal potions there, people just didn't spend quality time in cubicles. Their loss, she knew.

Myrtle felt a small laugh of anticipation bubble up in her throat as she floated through the door. Center stall, check for feet, and she was ready. Myrtle paused for a beat, letting the dramatic effect build. Since she stretched out her visit so to find new ratings every trip, she liked to milk the stops for all they were worth. Taking an unnecessary deep breath, she stepped inside the stall.

Scanning the wall for fresh ink, Myrtle ran a transparent finger a few centimeters over the wall, not quite touching it, so as not to be reminded of her current gaseous state. There they where, six months worth of ratings, clustered together along the top right corner of the wall. Albus Potter was at the centre of the grouping, his 8.3 not holding up to his brothers older rating of 8.9999. Myrtle smiled to herself over Hugo Weasley's 6.5. He was as insensitive to her as his father was, so the redhead had more than earned it.

She returned to her inspection of the newest ratings, trying not to gag at that 6th year Finnegan's 10, knowing some stupid girl out there must be blinded and in love. Her disgust would have driven her away, if she hadn't caught a glimpse of Scorpius Malfoy's 9.8. Myrtle couldn't wait to tell him, the quiet boy was almost (don't jinx it, Myrtle, she reminded herself), a friend. He'd approached her in his 2nd year, after his dad told him about her. Back then, she'd have been furious at another girl thinking of him _that way_, but she had lost interest after he grew to old for the young girl that she'd always be. Now she was only jealous of his happiness, not particularly caring that it was caused by the girl whose name he wouldn't tell her. Hopefully that girl had been the one to write it; if anyone was allowed to be happy, it was Scorpius. Now Myrtle's only problem was making sure he didn't forget _her_.

It was time to go now, Myrtle knew. Peeves liked to pop up when you least expected him, to startle people, and tonight was going too well to be ruined by the poltergeist. Myrtle couldn't remember the last time she'd been out and hadn't had something go wrong. Nothing would ruin tonight, she refused to offer up the opportunity. Perhaps she'd even check the other list, the one rating the girls. It hadn't been updated in years, but just to refresh her memory. There was nothing like seeing self-centered, pretty girls put down, even if they didn't know about it. Myrtle wasn't on it herself, of course. Nobody really cared about Myrtle Kirkpatrick, no matter how much she'd like them to. She forced herself to cheer up (the image of Hermione Granger with a tail usually did it), and drifted back out into the dim hallway. Tonight was her night.

**Sorry about the wait. It was long. I'm pretty much a waste of your wonderful time, favourites and alerts.** **On another note, the end is near! One more chapter,** '_Minerva: take 2_'.

**As always, copy and paste review suggestions! I'd love for the short on time/energy of you to pick one, I know I would...**

Do you try to be terrible?

Oh, gee whiz, I used to like this, but I've lost interest.

Nice enough.

Clearly you spent all those months working on this tirelessly, it's just that good.


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